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sex and love

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sex and love
NAME: Latoya Campbell
Course: philosophy of sex and love
Course code: Phil 3510
ID number: 620035263
Stream: Tuesday 6-7
Lecturer:
Tutor: Dr.Kutach
Questions: 1.Formulate a definition that will best reflect the concept of a sexual activity, and with the use of two (2) examples, illustrate/justify your definition. Introduction What is sex? Why are we as human being so obsessed with this activity? Do we need to know what a sexual activity is? What importance does this hold to us as human beings? We know what sex is (or we assume), but what is hard to know for sure is when are we engage in a sexual activity and what exactly is a sexual activity? From philosophers to psychologist they have spent decade trying to give us a clear understanding of what a sexual activity is but without any avail. It seems to gets more and more complicated to pin point what should are can be said to be a sexual activity after looking at all the definitions available to us. What are the necessary and sufficient factors that will inform an individual that they are indeed engaged in a sexual activity? We will first look on what a sexual activity is said to be by various philosophers which hopeful will help us to formulate a definition of our own. To understand the complexity of the subject matter we have to look on a number of definitions which should allow our research to come to a reasonable or justified conclusion to what a sexual activity can be. Definition of sex Before we can look on what a sexual activity we first have to look on what sex is.This should help us get a better understanding of what can be classified as a sexual activity. Sex is sometimes defined as a physical activity in which people touch each other 's bodies, kiss each other, etc. : physical activity that is related to and often includes sexual intercourse.Bertocci argued that sex can be the “means of communicating ones concern of the wider range of value “such as love ,marriage and family”. To him sex is not just penetration of the penis into the vagina but encompasses a much more complex activity .however Alan Goldman denies that sex is essentially a means of communication, he is not denying that sex can take on heightened value and meaning when it becomes a vehicle for the expression of feeling of love or tenderness”. He like many other think that we are too limited in your definition of sex and what a sexual activity.
Based on all the definitions that have been given on what is sex and when it has occur it safe to say we might not have a concrete definition. But philosophy seeks not only to solve problems but at least attempts to answer them, since there is no harm in trying ones best as deemed fit, that been said lets us look on the different definitions given as to what a sexual activity is and is not in order to form a justified conclusion. ARGUMENTS FOR WHAT IS A SEXUAL ACTIVITY What is a sexual activity you may ask? To a lot of individual a sexual activity only occur when penal penetration has taken place but philosophers have shown that this concept that we have been taught is quiet limited. Robert Gray is one such philosopher who has taken up this line of ordinary thought and has argued that "sexual activity" should be analyzed in terms of the production of sexual pleasure. He asserts that "any activity might become a sexual activity" if sexual pleasure is derived from it, and "no activity is a sexual activity unless sexual pleasure is derived from it".Grey’s definition tell us only one thing and that’s anything that produces pleasure can be a sexual activity, so simple eating our favorite chocolate can become sexual since it produced pleasure to that individual. To Grey to have pleasure is a sufficient criteria in knowing when someone is engage in a sexual activity. This means if one has no pleasure then a sexual activity has not taken place. If someone has in fact engaged in an activity that is sexual in nature but has fail to attain or provide pleasure in such a case it would not be implausible to say that this individual did not undergo a sexual experience and so did not engage in a sexual act.Grey’s theory showed support for a sex worker who provide pleasure for a client but has no pleasure in doing so even though they were in fact taking part in a activity that is sexual in nature. However this theory of grey’s create great discrepancies for individuals who has been rape or sexual acts that are labeled as perverted(unnatural) in nature. The idea of having an orgasm or feeling arousal during rape or molestation is a confusing and difficult one for many people, both survivors and secondary-survivors (friends/family). Many do not believe it 's possible for a woman or man to achieve orgasm during rape or other kinds of sexual assault. Some believe having an orgasm under these circumstances means that it wasn 't a "real" rape or the woman/man "wanted" it.Studies have shown that one of the complex aspects of rape is that most women experience intense orgasm during this cruel and gruesome act , which is very upsetting and confusing. The fact that this person had an orgasm (which indicate a level of sexual pleasure) during this terrible experience according to greys line of argument they would have been a subject of a sexual activity; but if they had no feeling of pleasure (even though they had an orgasm during the rape) they are excluded from being in a sexual activity. Critics have had one major problem with grey theory about sexual activity which has yet to be answered; what activities should we classify as sexual and non- sexual? With pleasure being the only evidence that a sexual activity has taken place how can we difference other sexual act that doesn’t produce pleasure? If we should accept grey’s analysis of what a sexual activity is our whole sex life would have be called into question. For many of us who have never had a pleasurable sexually encounter it would mean that we have never been involved in a sexual activity. What happens to desire and all other component that necessary and sufficient for asexual activity to take place? To accept this theory it would mean that a lot of us have never engaged in a sexual activity and that is very hard to comprehend that we can take part in a sexual act but yet did not engage in sexual activity and not derive any or much pleasure from it, but that fact should not give us reason for refusing to call these unsatisfactory events "sexual”. It is not enough to have pleasure for a sexual activity to occur one has to have desire has stated by Alan Goldman. Goldman argues that sexual desire is “desire for contact with another person 's body and for the pleasure that such contract produces; sexual activity is activity that tends to fulfill such desire of the agent”. He also discusses how it has become so culturally ingrained in our morals that it is hard to think of sex in the simplest of terms. For Goldman sex is just merely that, he doesn’t see it fitting for us to apply any other meaning to it than what it is.These definitions are meant to capture the central facts of human sexuality, rather than express some ideal superimposed on it. When somebody has a desire for something other than contact with another person 's body -- say, for merely looking at another 's body, or at other people engaging in sex, or for contact with another person 's clothes rather than body -- and the satisfaction of such desire produces the kind of pleasure the overwhelming majority of human beings achieve through contact with others ' bodies, the desire and the relevant activity are statistically abnormal and perverted. For Goldman though we are putting too much emphasis were it not needed. He argues that other accounts miss one of the crucial facts about sex – it is a highly pleasurable activity. He wishes to give an account of sexual desire that is based simply on sex itself. Sexual desire aims at pleasure so the best sex is the kind which affords it participants the most physical enjoyment. He went further say a prostitute performing oral sex would not be involved in a sexual activity. The prostitute is only involved in “earing”, not a desire for physical contact. He does believe that not all physical contact, touching etc, are sexual in nature .without the desire for physical contact in and of itself, but for other reasons, that these activities are predominantly nonsexual .therefore if the desire that leads to the act is not sexual, neither is the act. This statement will make one wonder what kind of activity would an individual who is masturbating be a part of? Is masturbation not a sexual activity that one has desire for a body? Why can’t a person desire their own body since sex is merely that? Critiques against Goldman and grey’s theory of sexual activity
With all this restriction, any of us, if any, will still look on a sexual activity has two individuals engaged in some form of penetration of the vagina and penis. But with all this disagreements about the definition of sexual activity, we find that even the definition that we have come to learn is very problematic.it is the view of Alan Goldman and Robert grey that one does not need the so call “sexual body part” to be involved for a sexual activity to take place.do we even know which of our body is sexual? Thomas Aquinas the catholic theologian stated that “god designed each of the body parts of human body to carry out specific functions”. He believed that ejaculation elsewhere than inside a human female vagina is un-natural.it violates god’s sagacious design. While philosophers such as grey and Goldman would see masturbation as a sexual activity because it produces pleasure and desire, Aquinas argue that when someone engages in the act of masturbation this individual as gone against what is natural and as of such the act has become sexually perverse .Sexual activity to Aquinas should only take place in the confined of marriage for procreative reasons. Kant like Aquinas also thinks that the act of sexual activity is bad because they are used as a means to an end rather than as an ends to a means. According to Kant (1977):”Sexuality is not an inclination which one human being has for another as such, but is an inclination for the sex of another. . . . Only her sex is the object of his desires”. (p. 62). They see desire and pleasure has the only means to how sexual activity can take place but to Aquinas and Kant this is the main purpose for sexual activity to occur. On the other hand, Metaphysical optimists like Plato and Irving Singer doesn’t t see anything bad or good in relation to any sexual activity, because a sexual activity is important for a strong relationship between a man and woman which is aimed for the purpose of procreation. What they have in common with Metaphysical pessimist (Kant and Aquinas) is that both believe sexual activity is more than merely having desire or pleasure. According to Singer(1996), “sexual activity is seen as a sexual interest which resembles an appetite in some respects, it differs from hunger or thirst in being an interpersonal sensitivity, one that enables us to delight in the mind and character of other persons as well as in their flesh” (vol 2: p.20) . A definition of a sexual activity may be defined if we consider the act as non-morally good or bad – or morally good or bad, it actually depends on the way it is performed or it’s after effects, be it positive or negative. Sometimes we derive little or no pleasure from a sexual act, (say) we are primarily giving pleasure to another person, or we are even selling it to the other person, and we think that even though the other person had a sexual experience, he or she didn’t. He didn’t see a sexual activity as only pleasure or desire but something that is very important to human being. Robert Solomon also disagree with Goldman and grey that asexual activity a is merely pleasure or desire; he stated that “sexual activity consist in speaking what we might call “body language”.it has its own grammar, delineated by the body and its own the body and its own phonics of touch and movement”. For a sexual activity to take place there has to be more to it that what means the eye. However huge wilder argued that like language, has many different functions, but no particular function is itself essential”.

Conclusion
I this essay I have examined what is sex to give a better explainatation of what a sexual activity is.I gave two arguments along with numerous critiques of the what should or can constitute as a sexual activity. The question asked us to defined what a sexual activity is and justify my definition but has you can see it was a hard task. Sexual activity vary depend on the person ethical, moral ,social background and as of such become problematic in justify without heavy criticism will however say one definition came close for me where Janice Moulton states that “sexual behavior differ from other behavior by virtue of its unique feelings and emotions and its unique ability to create shared intimacy”.my understanding of this statement IS that a sexual activity is beyond our outdated definition and it’s something that will have problem in defining and as of such will always be something that needs us to be open in our thinking. Bibliography ontact with others ' bodies, the desire and the relevant activity are statistically abnormal and perverted. 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Bibliography: ontact with others ' bodies, the desire and the relevant activity are statistically abnormal and perverted. 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    Our text book discusses four elements that link to a person’s sexual behavior. The four elements are fantasy, symbolism, ritualism and compulsion. The first element discussed in our text book is fantasy. The textbook says that “It is impossible to be sexual without some form of fantasy” (Holmes & Holmes, 2009). When a person gets to live out their sexual fantasies that is what makes the sexual act more intense. In order to have a sexual fantasy, one must be sexual. A person must have a fantasy in order to be sexually involved with another person or even with themselves. When a person has a sexual fantasy, it seems to enhance the intercourse. There are many types of fantasies that range from what one would call normal all the way up to what some might call completely bizarre. Unfortunetly, a lot of people watch “porn” in order to fulfill a fantasy. They fantasize while watching the movie or clip that it is a girlfriend, boyfriend, or even someone that they wish they could have. By fantasizing while watching, they are “pleasuring themselves”.…

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    Sexual Techniques

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    The first technique discussed is masturbation. This technique involves self-stimulation for the purpose of sexual pleasure without engaging in sexual intercourse. Fantasies are a sexual technique that was also talked about in this text. Sexual fantasies may be used by one partner or both partners. The reason couples may use fantasies is to increase arousal. Foreplay involves acts of cuddling, kissing and oral-genital stimulation. Kissing may be sexual foreplay or may be a form of expressing personal affection. Touching ranges from simple touching, such as holding hands to caressing another person’s erogenous areas. Touching can be just foreplay or just sexual intercourse. Oral-genital stimulation is called fellatio in male stimulation and cunnilingus in female stimulation. Typical and atypical sexual intercourse are also talked about in this text. The penetration of the penis into the vagina is typical intercourse. Intercourse can be accomplished in many different positions.…

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    Ways of Masturbating

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    Masturbation is defined as “sexual stimulation of a person 's genitals, usually to the point…

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    Necrophilia Cases

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    Sex according to many or may I say, majority, is the highest enjoyment in the planet. But the unsatisfying nature of sex leads to the uninterrupted series of encounters. Sex with same sex was recognized, adult sexually attracted to children or pedophilia, and zoophilia – the practice of sex between humans and animals.…

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    What is normal sexual behaviour? it depends more to the point, when is sexual behaviour that is somewhat different from the norm, morally abnormal or a disorder. Current views of…

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    Sex and People

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    Bruce LaBruce’s film Raspberry Reich is an awkward blending of gay porn and political satire inspired by real-life 1970s radical group the Baader-Meinhof gang of Germany. The Raspberry Reich is no more than a terrorist organization bent on destroying bourgeois capitalist ideals through a homosexual revolution. Raspberry Reich is purely pornographic. Just like pornography, the movie is interested in fantasy, both sexual and political. At the same time the film is thought provoking because of how LaBruce uses this film to exploit sexuality from all angles, which almost always seems to be affecting politics and making it the politics itself. In How to Look at Pornography, Laura Kipnis mentions this when she says “Within the incipient, transgressive space opened by its festival of social infractions is a medium for confronting its audiences with exactly those contents that are exiled from sanctioned speech, from mainstream culture and political discourse” (120).…

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    Are We Having Sex Now

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    We live in a society filled with so many different demographics such as gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender. With all of these different demographics we cannot give a clear definition for what is and is not sex for people. For example, when looking at oral sex, lesbians classify it as sex, compared to some heterosexual who don’t define it as being sex at all and just call it “sexual arousal” or “foreplay”.…

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    Love and people

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    Conflict is in many ways a power cause for a domino effect. Having conflict with someone whether it be killing, physical torture or mental abuse will cause something to happen or someone to react in a way that is often not a part of their everyday character. When people are involved in conflict most will come out the other side but often it will change something about them or their inner character. In the film Paradise Road it captures the essence of how different people will change in different ways in order to help themselves and others survive.…

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    Sex and Love

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    What is the connection between sex and love? In particular, is there an obligation to restrict sex to relationships involving love? Or, is the insistence that sex be accompanied by love based on a degrading view of sexuality - that sex is bad an in need of redemption by love? Is romantic (sexual, erotic) love a kind of illusion and trap that it is best avoided? These are just some examples of the different points we will be discussing. There are those that believe sex ought to be separated from love. Some have the belief that erotic love is a biological illusion and a trap for women. A quote from Marilyn French's novel states that "Love is insanity.... It is the taking over of a rational and lucid mind by delusion and self-destruction. You love yourself, you have no power over yourself, you can't even think straight."…

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    Imagine that your partner (who has not taken this course) begins to experience one of the sexual problems discussed in this section (your choice). Explain how you would probably feel. Also, assuming no physical cause, how would you help your partner understand and resolve the problem?…

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    Speech on Teen Sex

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    For teens, the mere thought of sex can be overwhelming. I know, I have been a teenager before. However, there is so much to think about, so much to worry about, and so much that can go wrong. Whether you are sexually active or not, knowing the facts about what sex is, and what it is not, is very important. And I am here to feed you with some knowledge about “What is SEX all about?” please, bear with me till then.…

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    love and lust

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    “…but I can’t help falling in love with you”. That classic love song that was composed some time ago by Elvis Presley. It makes people wonder did her really know what love was or what was going on? Everyone has experienced “love” at some point in their lives. But do people really know the difference between love and infatuation? When comparing these two theoretically the meanings are a world apart but differentiating between the two in a real life scenario is no easy task. Love is said to be tenderness and passionate affection that is directed at someone else while infatuation is just blind, foolish and exaggerated passion towards another individual.…

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    Love and happiness

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    1Find a safe place to practice. Concrete is the easiest surface to bike on but is unforgiving if you fall. (With correct braking technique and a properly adjusted seat, however, this should not be an issue. See steps below for more details.) Short grass or even tidy gravel would be acceptable alternatives for anyone who feels panicky about falling, but be forewarned that these surfaces make balancing harder and offer more resistance to bike tires. Wherever you end up going, make sure it has both flat areas and gentle slopes (to help you build momentum) but no tight spaces, steep slopes, or traffic.…

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    Love And Life

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    Love is an emotional action word used to show compassion and is shown through acts of kindness. Love is one of the strongest emotion and it is held above hate because it can destroy hate. Love is the reason of human life because everything revolves around love and everything was made with love and was made by love and we all can share that love but some people don’t understand how to show love and how to receive it. In my little life I had only two loves and they both didn’t last long. My first love is my father, he loved me and wanted the best for me and loved me like his own and held me close to his heart and didn’t stop and neither did I. I can’t stop loving him. He made me feel so special, loved, wanted, like I belonged, like life would be ok but when he died I felt like a part of me was cut off and it hurt. My life went south after my dad was died and I was raped and my self-worth, confidence, self-esteem was decreasing. I was in primary school and I was teased and bulled and then I started smoking and drinking I started to have sex with anyone because I didn’t care anymore, I thought that I was just like my mother and that this is all I’ll amount to and I continued until I was fed up and i started to look to men to hurt them and make them to feel what I was feeling by dating them make them feel so good about themselves and then I would take it all away when I feel that I wasn’t enjoying it anymore, when I was fed up and I would move on to a different guy and I would repeat when I did to the last but I would only pick the one who love sex and would do anything for it and who was a little emotional so they would feel it. This continued until I meet tevon. He sawed me how to kiss, he taught me that I shouldn’t fall in love to fast or I would get hurt but I don’t know why I can stop loving the way I do. But then we broke up and I continued to hurt men until I started to realize that I was hurting myself more and i decided to stop…

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